Book Notes: The Happiness Project

[AN: All notes are taken verbatim from the book. I claim no rights to them.]

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

Pg 10—her 12 commandments

Pg 11—her secrets of adulthood

Pg 45—hug for at least 6 seconds; promotes serotonin

Pg 51—significant other doesn’t need every single piece of your emotional baggage dumped on him/her. Big things are okay; small, truly insignificant ones, not okay.

Pg 52—approaches to intimacy: (Philip has told me for years that he doesn’t care if I have to do homework all afternoon; he just wants to be in the same room. I always felt guilty because I had work to do and viewed as not spending time with him. For him, it was quite the opposite, we were in the same room, and therefore, we were spending time together.)

She quotes so many people that it is obvious she’s done her research.

Pg 100—though this is in the parenting section, it could work for anyone: acknowledge feelings, both good and bad. Denying bad feelings intensifies them; but acknowledging them allows good feelings to return more quickly. (Personal experience: in my house growing up, being unhappy was criticized. You were expected to be happy all the time, because your life was good and you had nothing to feel bad about. It didn’t matter that at that particular moment you were legitimately upset, you had to fake being happy or you were given the third degree.)

Pg 152—people’s lives are more complicated than they appear from the outside

Pg 153—“fundamental attribution error”

Pgs 161-162—other people’s commandments

Pg 166—prosperity allows us to turn our attention to more transcendent matters—to yearn for lives not just of material comfort but of meaning, balance, and joy

Pg 169—when money or health is a problem, you think of little else; when it’s not a problem, you don’t think much about it

Pg 181—“to live in a perpetual want of little things is a state, not indeed of torture, but of constant vexation” ~Samuel Johnson

Pg 184—cost to fix it > cost to replace = replace; cost to fix it < cost to replace = fix it

Pg 185—spending out creates a wealth of love and tenderness, while calculation and score-keeping build resentment (Mother, pay attention to that)—why bother saving the good china or linens for a special occasion that may never come? Use them now!>>> your own real hardback books for $30; self-publish your stuff!

Pg 238—koans: a question of statement that cannot be understood logically

It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one to takes notes while I read

Pg 240—heuristics: mental rules of thumb; the quick, commonsense principles you apply to solve a problem or make a decision

Pg 243—buy anything you want at the grocery store, cooking is always cheaper than eating out (LOVE THIS ONE!)

Pg 274—within marriage, it takes at least 5 good acts to repair the damage of one destructive act.

Pg 274—you will always feel the loss of a certain amount of money greater than if you gained the same amount

She really likes to quote Samuel Johnson. Seems to be more quotes from him than anyone else

Pg 286—the days are long, but the years are short

Pg 288—even if you mess up one day, the next day is a clean slate!

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